I would like to thank my arms, for always being by side. My legs, for always supporting me, and my fingers…because I can always count on them.
this will be my speech when i win an oscar
Don’t forget the hips, for not lying.
haha if youre bored you could kiss me idk just sayin
I know drugs are bad and that they ruin families but so does monopoly and that’s still legal
ok new rule: if you’re gonna call me “cute” you have to specify whether you mean “cute like a little girl/baby animal” or “cute enough to bang mercilessly”
If a dead ancestor doesn’t appear in the sky to stop me, it can’t be that bad of a decision
why do girls have fake pockets when guys can fit a laptop in theirs